Posted in personal development

Calm: when things don’t quite go your way

Calm

I remember thinking as a young girl that things are not what they seem. Our life’s journey is so much deeper than what we see and experience. It is not so much about what you are going through, but how you respond to whatever it is that you are going through. We all have and will continue to experience things that will provide an opportunity (for some a challenge) for growth. It’s our perspective that will help shape our experience and guide our actions.

It is more about what we need to learn from our experiences. I know it is easier said than done at times. But if we stop blaiming ourself and/or others for what we experience and take responsibility for our beliefs, thoughts, and actions and ask “what am I to learn” instead of “who can I blame”, we may start to see the world and our journey in a different light.

Timika

Posted in Children and parenting, Columbus Mom, Destiny, Irksome, Ohio mom, Uncategorized

Irksome

Irksome

Image result for intuition

dataremixed.com

What’s irksome for me is when I do not listen to my gut/intuition.  I am learning more and more each day that even when I do not understand the reasons beyond a thought or a gut reaction; it is okay. I do not have to see the future before I decide to take action; it is important to have faith and trust that things will work out.  Usually, the answer as to why I should do something, will come within a few minutes, hours, days, or even in some cases, years later.  It feels good when I do follow my gut to leave and go to the store now, to call a friend or my mom now, to send a text now, or visit someone now, because usually when I do, I tend to have a more desirable outcome, than if I did not follow my gut/intuition.  I have had many instances, over the years, when I felt like I should have said or done something and did not.

It is not so much about regretting not saying or doing something I felt I should have.  It is about trusting myself.  It is about trusting yourself. We need to trust the guide inside and be able to let go of needing to control everything in our life and let go….

Image result for intuitionWhen you feel the need to encourage a loved one to check his or her blood pressure, blood sugar, to go and check on your children, to take your son or daughter to the doctor, to sign up for a class, to start your own business, to go on vacation, to take care of yourself, to patiently wait for the train to pass (I’ve seen the results of individuals wanting to beat trains), to ask the pharmacist why this month’s pills are different from last month, to remind the doctor that it is your left leg that is bothering you instead of your right, to ask your doctor for a generic form of the drug he or she is prescribing you, to leave the house later than usual, to end a relationship with someone, to go back and check to see if you locked the door, to go back and check to see if you turned off the stove, to say no to someone, to wear certain clothes instead of the one you picked out, waiting until morning to take the trash out………and more.

Follow your gut/intuition.  Most likely, you will be glad you did.

Timika

Posted in Motherhood, Ohio mom, Rearrange, Uncategorized

Rearrange my life to keep my sanity?

Rearrange

 

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. Albert Einstein

Intellectually, I knew my life needed a change years ago, and it has been a journey! I used to think that once someone became a mother, “that’s it! Your life is over. You don’t have time for anything else.” I am the one who planted those beliefs and have had to dig them up by the roots and throw them away….

I would hear so many mothers talk about how they did not have time for themselves, and honestly, it should not and does not have to be that way. I know some single mothers who managed to earn a college degree or further their career and still raise their children. I know because I was raised by a single mother. Who says that a mother cannot continue to develop her gifts and talents and enjoy doing things for herself and taking time out to replenish her soul?

Two great quotes by Henry Ford will empower you if you let them:

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.”
― Henry Ford

“Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.”
― Henry Ford

In the past, I tried different techniques to help keep me accountable. I tried printing out and posting a schedule I made out using Cozi Family Organizer http://www.cozi.com/. I know the schedule by heart because I have also written it down multiple times, as well. It’s great to use reminders. I realized, though, that my beliefs needed to be dealt with and challenged.

I can honestly say that a recent vacation helped me to clear my head and truly think about things that are truly important to me. I love my family, and I love myself, too. I concluded that:

1. I am the one in charge of my life….my mother would always tell me that and even today, she finds a way to squeeze the reminder in our conversations.

2. Everything does not have to be done today. I need to prioritize and plan for tomorrow…hopefully, I will see another day.

3. My health-physical, mental, emotion, and spiritual, is important as is everyone else.

4. I need to be organized-I function better and able to make the most use of my time. If tasks have a day and time to be completed, then I tend to use my time more efficiently, and many times within the past week, I realize how much free time I have when I am organized.

5. It is better for me to focus on one task at a time until its completion. It’s okay to multitask and know when it is beneficial to multitask and when it is not. I always encourage my students to focus on what needs to be done now or has a timeline. If you have two projects, and one is due in November, and the other in January, don’t delay. Plan to complete the November task, especially if multitasking is not working.

6. It is important to make a to-do list and cross off as I go. Be consistent with scheduled activities, and I will be more efficient.

7. I do not label myself or generalize my actions. I do not like labels, and I believe people will think and act according to their label and get stuck.

8. I make time for the things I have an interest in (cooking and trying out new recipes, listening to music and being more proficient at playing the piano and guitar, sew, paint, make pottery, candles, and lip gloss/lipstick. Things will not get done unless I make them a priority. Continue to develop/explore me.

9. I have to live with the consequences of my behavior, and my consequences can directly or indirectly effect others… My days go a lot better when I have made time for myself.

10. I do not take myself too seriously. Continue to laugh!!